August 31, 2016 - 13 weeks, 4 days

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

We heard the baby's heartbeat today. My tiny little pomegranate seed is growing. (S/he is actually the size of a lemon this week).

I feel pregnant. Apparently I don't look pregnant, but that's just ... bullshit. I totally do. I can feel it too; my pants are just a bit too tight. Like a food baby, except a real baby.

Since I have J, I haven't been tracking everything as much. It's hard not to track the vomiting, since I'm still doing that most mornings.

When J is up and brushing his teeth with us, and I run to the toilet, he gets so concerned. He rubs my back, hugs me and looks at me with those giant blue eyes and says, "mama". It's heartbreaking. I have to reassure him, because I'm sure he thinks I'm dying. I sure feel like it.

J likes to put cream on my belly, which is amazing. Last time I used Basq (in the milk and honey scent - divine!) and I didn't get any lasting stretch marks, so I'm using it again.

Motherhood Maternity
He also kisses my belly. We aren't sure if he knows there's a sibling in there, even though we tell him there is; how much does a 1.5 year old understand?

If I had more time, I'd probably sleep more or relax more or watch more Netflix with a sheet mask on my face and a fizzy fruit drink by my side. I don't though, so instead, J and I play, dance and read stories... with a fizzy fruit drink by my side. I'm not an alcoholic, but I find myself wishing I was the kind of pregnant woman who wasn't scared of a bit of alcohol. I am though and I won't imbibe.

Husband knows that as soon as the epidural wears off and I'm feeling up to it, liquor better be flowing in my house.

As it is, I can't wait for cooler temperatures. Baby isn't that big and already I'm just so damn hot.

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